A Different Side of Me

Ever Feel like the whole weight of the world is just coming crashing down on you? And i don't mean just the day to day things we have to do in life. But i mean you can actually feel the weight of the world, the worries of the masses, the cries of the thousands, the griefs, the mourning, the sheer sadness? I don't know why, but for some reason lately i have. I think to some degree i always have. I have always felt like i was pretty in tune to the world around me, and the things and people that surround me. I have always been a background person, an observer, a people watcher i guess. To sit back and absorb what happens around me. To see the reactions of others, the emotions, well life. Even sometimes just sitting on my patio, listening to the sounds of the world, the sirens, the cars screeching, the winds rustling, dogs barking. Its all communication. The world as a whole communicates every second of every day to us.

But for some reason lately its increased. I have felt this huge sadness. I cant place it, but its everywhere i go. I sense it in everything, and even in nothing. Sometimes its so overwhelming it makes not just cry, but truly grieve.

I sat in traffic today on my way home from work. sitting at a stop light, a funeral procession was going in front of me. It was in slow motion, at least to me it was. I could feel the cries, the grief passing before me. I could hear it in my heart. I have no idea who it was. But for some reason it was so strong, i felt like i did. I felt as if it could have been my own mother. The sadness was so overwhelming, tears couldn't help but fall. And car after car after car went by. One of the longer processions i have seen in a long time. So maybe that is why? Someone who was obviously greatly loved had passed. So does that amount of grief then, project? It must, i guess the question is, are you open or vulnerable enough to feel it. I am not sure why lately i am, but i am.

That feeling has not left me since. I cant shake it. And it's not just this funeral procession, but so many other things. I think i have always had a stronger empathy for people, because of all the medical stuff i have gone through and things i have seen. So i think i have always opened myself up to these feelings more. And, never would i regret that. But its odd how now, all the sudden its so strong. Almost as if the world as a whole is crying. What does this mean? I cant think its nothing. I cant think its my imagination. Is there something greater to come? Something on a mass scale?

So i listen to the cries. I feel the grief. I let the tears come. For something i cannot see. For something i cannot understand yet. But maybe one day will

Mother Nature Is Not Happy!

Most of my friends have heard me say this over the past few weeks. Mother Nature is Not Happy! Well, she's not! lol Let me sum it up for you in 4 easy words: Blizzards, Flooding, Tornadoes, Earthquakes.

Ok now reading that, you would think i live in some crazy town. Nope! Midwest, Missouri to be exact. But since the new year hit, we have had the craziest weather ever here! Breaking all kinds of weather records. From record snow fall, blizzard conditions (we never get), to the next day record flooding! We had snow on Easter (yes easter!) and even frost up to a week ago! Devestating Tornadoes, and above all Earthquakes! Yes, Yes i did say earthquakes! Not one, mind you, but several, with over several dozen after shocks in a manner of i think 2 weeks.

I'm just waiting for the ground to open up and swallow us all! ok ok maybe a bit dramatic here. But as i type this, its already been raining for over 36 hours straight. and more rain to come!

So what i wonder is, are odd odd things like this happening all over?? Montana getting less snow than us? Texas getting snow at all! Something screwy going on here!

All this unsettled weather got me to looking around etsy too. Curious to see if any sellers were inspired by their own odd weather patterns the last few months. I couldnt help but love this painting called Faultline - very fitting if i do say so myself, by JenMcCleary . Just love the textures and colors and depth of it.

Then i came across this photo of NYC Blizzard of '05. Now, granted i dont live in NYC, and it's '08, but still it was just as desolate here too when we had all that snow. You can find this amazing picture and others at minusfive.

Then i found this amazing picture called Here Comes The Flood by irenesuchoki . I love the colors, especially in the sky here. Almost gives it a sureal feel to it.

And, i'll leave you with this final one, called simply The Farm by toughpickle which can only make me think of saying...... We are not in Kansas anymore.